Dear HGTV:
I realize that what I’m about to say is putting my chance* of becoming your next home décor and DIY tv superstar at risk. (*A .0001% chance that has now been decreased to .00000000000000001%.) But I’m breaking up with you. And it’s not me, it’s you.
The time has come for me to lay it all out there. You see (though you might not know it), our love affair began years ago when I, on maternity leave, found myself spending hours on the couch nursing and rocking my newborn baby girl. In my half-alive state at that time, you took me off of that couch (in my spit-up covered shirt, messy ponytail hair, and makeup-less face), and put me in the middle of a world that was colorful, engaging, and exciting.
You put on your finest clothes and wooed me with shows like Curb Appeal, Selling New York, Bang for Your Buck, Design on a Dime, and Sarah’s House. Your hosts’ sparkling personalities and shows’ interesting topics made my long days and nights so much more bearable. The way John Gidding could turn the ugliest front yards into works of art on Curb Appeal was captivating! Suddenly I wanted to re-do my yard, too! And don’t even get me started with the adorable Sarah Richardson and her innate ability to mix pattern and color on Sarah’s House. (Plus, her sidekick, Tommy Smythe, was so cute I could pinch his cheeks.) Those two inspired me to start decorating my new/old home with quirky accents and things I loved.
In those days, you and your shows worked hard to fill me with hope and a desire to make the spaces around me more beautiful, but in an affordable and realistic way. Your programming was diverse and unique, and I was a self-proclaimed HGTV junkie. I’m sure you even had something to do with me starting this little blog.
But time has a way of changing things, and our relationship has soured. HGTV, you’ve let yourself go. You have lost yourself (or, at the very least, the “G” in HGTV – do you even have a show about gardens or landscaping anymore?). With yesterday’s announcement that you’ve added yet another house flipping show to your lineup (Windy City Flip, with the painfully bland host, Alison Victoria (does she not have a last name?)), I realized you have cheated on me and your other loyal viewers with the devil of cheap and formulaic programming.
By my count, you now have at least NINE house flipping shows that all follow the exact same formula: man and woman buy godforsaken home, gut it, find x amount of “awful problems,” install some cheap finishes, and then sell it two weeks later. Do you really have that many viewers who are out flipping houses? I don’t think so!
And don’t get me started on the FOURTEEN versions of House Hunters. At least with those you’ve tried to fool me into thinking you’re still interesting by giving some of them different names (like Beachfront Bargain Hunt, Caribbean Life, Island Hunters, Mexico Life, and Lakefront Bargain Hunt), and forsaking the trademark doorbell ringing sound in the opening credits.
Now that Chip & JoJo have jumped ship, you have nothing left to offer me. HGTV you are boring and unimaginative, and this is the end. It was good while it lasted, but now you can pack your boxes and exit stage left. Me – I’ll be fine sitting here on my couch with my messy ponytail and makeup-less face (the babies are grown so no spit-up anymore), watching another network.
-Bre
P.S. to any readers who feel the same way, please share this post on Facebook or Pin it! Maybe HGTV will see it and get it together! 🙂
JoAn says
Oh now you’ve done it …. Reminded me of all those wonderful shows that used to be on HGTV. I must have shoved them out of my mind but now I am in mourning for them. I agree there are too many flip shows. Maybe they will listen and bring back the format from the earlier shows. We can only hope.
Bre says
HAHAHA I know!! As I was writing this the shows just kept coming to mind – I had forgotten how many good ones they had! It is a shame what they’ve done! Well, who knows, maybe they will improve – you’re right that we can only hope!
Connie b. says
I hope they do bring back some of the oldies ! They were great!
Sue says
I’m with you all. I miss David and Vern, etc. Funny how ii came across this article as I was just talking about this to my husband . He have an opinion in the past but now agrees with all of us. PLEASE SEND YOUR LETTER .
Signed , not q a flipper.
Bre says
Hahaha! I sent my letter, Sue. I think you should send one too! (Have your husband send one as well!)
Angela says
AMEN!
Bre says
🙂 Hopefully they’ll get their act together!!
Traci says
I agree. I actually still enjoy House Hunters and House Hunters International, if just to see how much money buys what in different areas. But then HGTV did every reiteration of that, which seems to be a pattern once they get a hit show. We see the SAME thing ad nausuem until you can’t watch one more program. I think I would watch HGTV more if there was more variety, I think every new flip looks pretty much the same and while Chip and Joanna are darling together and I do enjoy them, there are other decorating styles out there. Where is the “G”? I would love to see more gardening shows. Floral shows, gardens for growing and eating. I live in an urban area, tell me how to do this in my “H”…
Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone.
Bre says
I’m in an urban area, too, and I love the idea of a show focusing on small space design (indoor and out)! You should pitch the idea to HGTV, Traci! 🙂 Thanks for stopping by and leaving your comment; hopefully HGTV will get its act together soon!